Wednesday, April 25, 2007

April is the Cruelest Month

As noted a few posts ago, tomorrow is Boy and my anniversary.
Spring is a time of getting-together-ness.
Two of my best friends have their anniversaries within a month of ours.
Just a little bit later.
Just out of the crunch.
So they are happily planning gifts and romantic things, and coming to me for advice, and I'm looking at tomorrow... I work all day, and then I finish the draft a paper due Friday. Boy does the same.
Today I work all day on starting said draft. He is in meetings all day.
Friday? Who knows. We have our little club meeting, we maybe relax for a day in the midst of everything. I am fairly certain that there is something I am forgetting about that I need to do that day. Maybe it's just the ever-present work.
We don't have the time for an anniversary right now. We were going to go to M's house, but we don't have time. We were going to go to dinner, but we don't have time or money. We were going to do a scene, but we don't have time. If we're lucky we won't be too exhausted for a quickie.
Boy and I are generally doing very well right now. We are in love and happy to be with eachother and the relationship is pretty well ballanced at this point. And I think that probably I prefer being happy and in love right around our anniversary to being in a worse-place relationship wise and having the time to celebrate it.
I'm only grumpy because of the extremity of the situation, really. If we had time to sit together, to pour cider into glasses and toast ourselves, do a nice cathartic scene and then cuddle, that would be fine. I don't need a huge date, I need an hour and a half. But our anniversary fell in the two days when an hour and a half isn't to be found.
(True, we could just put it off, but I know the Boy and myself. If we say "We'll celebrate it next week", we won't celebrate it.)
So that's my ranting.
It's been a year and it's been sweet and bitter and difficult and excellent and I hope that we have alot more to come, and once it has passed I will be alot more zen about not being able to comemorate it, but today it makes me grumpy.


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